There Is Glitter In The Doorway

An Epiphany on the Path Towards Mindfulness

written in July 2019

I rolled out my mat in yoga class yesterday. A constellation of loose glitter stared back at me.

These microscopic reflections of light took turns telling me a story, each one whispering a different worry.

I saw myself in child’s pose, forehead pressed into a speck of glitter. I saw myself at the coffee shop next, glitter sparkling in the light as I looked down at my wallet to pay. I heard the barista say, “You have something on your face.” I felt my cheeks turn red.

This scene, this whole story of how my day might play out, came to me in that one moment of rolling out my yoga mat and seeing glitter.

My teacher Erinn sat down on her cushion in front of the class.

“My feet look dirty today because I cleaned the floors this morning,” she said, stretching her feet onto the wooden floor in front of her mat. “So I was in the storage room getting the cleaning spray and the rags and the broom when I saw this little box of leftover glitter from one of our art projects. And I thought it’s all perspective, right? This stuff looks like it’ll do the trick — let’s clean the floors with glitter today. So we did and,” she paused as the studio erupted with laughter.

“You might see little specks of glitter here and there on your mat. And if that gives you anxiety because it’s glitter and glitter, as we know, never really goes away — then let’s talk about it after class.” The room laughed again and now, so did I.

I looked down at my mat, saw my worry, the whole story I created about the coffee shop and the comment about my face and the embarrassment I felt.

Glitter, as it catches light, changes colors. I saw green, silver, red, blue, and orange. Each color — a new perspective.

I poured my head onto my mat, stamping my skin straight into the glitter, and I smiled.